My name is Zara Phillips.

I am an adoptee activist/author/playwright/musician

I used to think that when I grew up, I would not be or feel adopted anymore. I found that was a myth of adoption.

There is a lifelong impact to being adopted. I wish someone had told me.

As a child, I would hold my adopted mother’s hand walking down the street, looking at womans faces and wonder if I would recognize her, the mother I dreamt about.

On Birthdays I would feel such a deep sadness. I never understood why. I was silent, told to be grateful for what I had.

Adoption is the only trauma in the world where the victim is supposed to feel grateful.

I reunited with my birthmother in 1988 and my birthfather thanks to ancestry DNA in 2016. Many years in between the reunions. I was now a professional at reunions. I learnt the grief comes up during this time. I learnt that no matter how exciting it was there was a rollercoaster of emotions that I could never have imagined.

My passion today is to no longer be silent. I no longer protect everyone else because they ‘can’t handle it’ I did it for too long and it almost destroyed me.

When I help other adoptees, young and old it gives me a sense of purpose and meaning.

Adoption is full of loss and love. I can feel both. I can love many.

Zara is an adoptee advocate, author, actor and songwriter. Her most recent book ‘Somebody’s Daughter’  was adapted into a  film based on her one woman show of the same name now available on amazon prime UK and US.

She wrote the song ‘I’m Legit with DMC in 2009.

Zara has written articles and books speaks passionately on her experience as an adoptee to the mental health profession and adoption community.

She currently sings and tours with her husband Richard Thompson.