Ruby Barnett spent her childhood dreaming of a life filled with sunshine and rock stars. Born in California in 1969, she stayed with her birthmother for an unknown amount of time (between three weeks and six months). She was adopted by a British couple, who’d lived some years in the US, and moved back to England when Ruby was two. She was raised in an orthodox Jewish home in North London. Although being adopted was not hidden from her, talking about it was frowned upon.

As a young adult, Ruby ended every relationship she was in, abruptly according to the former partners. A therapist suggested that this might be adoption-related and that reunion may be the solution. Following the birth of her daughter, she decided to search for her birth families. California remains a closed state where adoptees are not able to gain access to their original birth records or adoption files. With the help of a search angel (pre-internet), she found her original name and that of her birth mother. Her original name included her birth father’s unusual last name so she was able to find him easily. They have now been in and out of each other’s lives for over twenty years.

Her birth mother took four years to find. After signing Ruby away, she lived on the streets, only gaining stable housing in a care facility in the last years of her life. They had sporadic contact until her death in 2024.

After many years of living nomadically, over achieving, then abandoning her achievements, Ruby now lives less than 40 miles from where she was born. She is finishing up her memoir Rotten Stock, an exploration of adoption trauma, feelings of never-quite-belonging, and her labyrinthine path to wholeness.